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I heard babies are a great source of inspiration when it comes to writing. I was lacking ideas for my blog posts lately, so I got myself one.
It has been three months already, but I have to report that my expectations in this regard were unfortunately not met. My baby is boring. Where do I leave a customer review?
The hope for it to change is still there though, as he laughs a lot, either about me or about something that is going on in his small hairless head. I’d like to think it’s the latter, and he is making up jokes I will be able to borrow for my posts when he starts talking.
So, babies. What do you want to know? Let me answer my own questions from the pre-baby time for you I wish somebody answered for me then so I would have slept better.
I used to think it is so easy. Called your sister names? Bad. Peed in the pool? Shame on you and… bad! Killing puppies for fun? Doing drugs? Very, very bad. But not talking to your parents and planning to keep them out of your life forever? Bad? How bad? “Two years on probation” or “20 to life” bad? Can I plead extenuating circumstances?
My mother sent me an email. It was a table, probably a copy-paste from MS Word. One could see she put a lot of effort into it.
The table has two columns. One lonely point on the left: Things I did right in my life. Whole seven points on the right and an ellipsis. Dot. Dot. Dot. As if there was more to it, but she just got tired typing. All the things I did wrong. It was two years ago. We haven’t spoken ever since.